How Do You Know if You’re in Love?

Taking a Philosophical Approach

Arguably, the most infamous philosophy of love comes from no other than Plato. The Ancient Greek Philosopher defined three different types of love, according to the Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy (IEP):

1. Eros – an intense, passionate, often sexual desire
2. Philia – a fondness and appreciation, not limited to friends, family members, or coworkers
3. Agape – a fondness and passion that is not contingent upon reciprocity

From Plato’s approach, agape is hailed as the “perfect” kind of love. It is a more refined blend of eros and philia. It is pure, sacred, even holy.

You feel agape when you “love thy neighbor as thyself,” as the IEP explains. It founds love on the grounds of selflessness and the importance of loving others.

Plato and other philosophers of his era value romantic attraction higher than both sexual and physical attraction.

“Modern romantic love returns to Aristotle’s version of the special love two people find in each other’s virtues-one soul and two bodies, as he poetically puts it,” the IEP states.

An article published in The Philosophy Quarterly analyzes love as a reactive emotion.

This reaction may be:

• An affectionate attachment
• A altruistic response to character
• A response to acts of goodwill and other motivational behaviors

You may also mistake superficial feelings of physical attraction or monetary benefits as “love,” but they are not the qualities of a meaningful, intimate relationship.

This approach demonstrates why you may react to someone with such great admiration, or why someone may admire you based upon your overall character in conjunction with your behavior towards your significant other.